11/28/2014

wow long time no see....
looks alike I'm coming here in trouble or when I've got a question or problem.
many things happened. been to Paris, didn't like it. my film almost failed my show almost did too. 
I almost got my heart broken. oh and I've spent a week in Poland. was lovely. disputing the fact I'm more a like in need of a knee surgery. the best case scenario is a physical therapy. well I'll probably need a mental one too. ladies and gentlemen, the crazy auntie has arrived.

the reason why I've came back is tomorrow. or today.
I'm gonna be 22. sounds horrible, ridiculous and pretty much, scary.
it's no longer a child who became an adult. I'm adult now. funny fan fact- still living with parents.
I'm afraid I'm not progressing as fast as I would like to. and I keep failing and hurting people who I love. 
Everything happening around is touching me but only slightly. Like wind, not evolving the changes but you can feel it. but it's not forcing you to take any steps against it. 
got an offer. can keep a flat abroad but have to pay bills. not so bad but then heard how much it would be and started thinking do I even wanna live there one day or when all of my people will be gone would I be paying visits or just leave it the way it is, pretending my nationality never happened. pretending I'm the citizen of the world (but to be true I always felt like one, may have got roots and be attached but world is too big to waist my time for just one place).

My sister's 20. I'm almost 22 (just minutes....) and what are we going to do with our lifes?
do we need a push or are we hiding from the truth?